Hurt,
a four letter word that has the potential to change a person's entire
life. Hurt can come in either the form of physical or emotional.
Physical hurts heal faster than emotional hurts. When we are hurting it does not only affect us, but also those people who care about us. That also goes for our actions, they impact those around us in a positive or negative way. I am not suggesting that we live our lives for other people, but just to be conscious that before we make a decision to think of how it will affect us later in our life, and our relationships with other people.
Hurts that have occurred in our past can have a reflection in our future, depending on how we dealt with the situation at that time. Sometimes it may seem easier to push everything into the recesses of our mind and say that our situation is different. Although, the reality is that nobody is immuned to life. One decision can lead to the road of self destruction, leaving us to look back on what we have either damaged or destroyed. At that point we must make a decision: continue down this path of destruction or we can change.
After being hurt by other people our instincts may tell us to build up that wall and begin to live our lives with the mentality of self preservation. This can cause many problems, especially with relationships close to the heart like our family and loved ones. The love never goes away, but it may take more effort to repair that relationship.
People who have been tend to hurt other people. This is a vicious cycle, but it is up to us as individuals to make things right as we realize them. It may seem difficult to stand alone on a decision, but we need to make decisions that will give us the best possible future. Although it may be hard to do, it is worthwhile to look deeply and reflect on these aspects of our life. It may be difficult to open up, but those who truly care will accept it and they will still be there. If anyone has encountered a hurtful situation or is currently going through a similar ordeal, feel free to contribute or ask questions.
-Jane Marie
Its been 48 years since I was hurt by a comment from a classmate - a comment that in retrospect should have been easily brushed off but in fact influenced the way I saw myself for years to come. I was in the 8th grade and for some reason the teacher asked each student to describe the person who sat in front of them. The person who described me said that I had a face like a horse, stringy mouse colored hair, and a zit covered face - ouch! I felt my face get red and my eyes tear up - I wanted to bolt from class. Instead I just laughed along with the rest of the class and tried to think of some witty self depracating remark to hide my shame. My voice shook when I described the person sitting in front of me, in fact I don't remember what I said but it was short and kind. That painful description of me stayed with me for years - I never thought of myself as attractive before and certainly not after. I was always shy and after that I was aloof by choice. I don't know which was worse; hearing myself described that way, or pretending that it didn't hurt. I wish I could say that I went on to be a better person and not hurt others as I had been, but I'm sure that I could have been kinder. When I finally left for college I got some much needed perspective and as I became more confident I didn't feel the need to demean others to raise my own esteem. Be kind to others, a few acts of kindness can go a long way and may make an unexpected difference in a person's life. ZP
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